This Is How I'd Love You by Hazel Woods

Author:Hazel Woods
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Penguin Group US
Published: 2014-07-27T16:00:00+00:00

Part Two

When Hensley opens her eyes, there is a woman beside the bed. Her posture erect, her arms folded patiently in her lap. The room is dim—she has no idea the time of day, or even what day it is—but Hensley feels sure it is her mother. The woman doesn’t touch her. She doesn’t speak. Her face is composed, unmoved. But she worries over Hensley. Hensley knows, could sense, even before she was fully conscious, that this woman has been sitting here for hours, watching her sleep. In fact, could it be that at one point her mother’s hands were actually on her, smoothing her hair, easing her shoulders onto the pillow, stroking her temple?

This memory wakes her, tears seeping from behind her eyes into her throat. It was this presence, though, this reassurance, that allowed her to sink so far into the blackness that gathered around her, pulling at the edges of her mind, pushing its weight onto her chest. She simply gave in to it. She left all resistance to her mother, knowing that she would pull her back when it was time. It was as though she’d been loaded into a small rowboat, sack upon sack tossed on top of her slight body, until she could no longer move. The undecipherable rhythm of the water as it sloshed against the hull filled her ears with its urgency. She floated in those dark waters, bearing the weight, grateful for the grief that did not need words. That it was not hers alone.

But it was not her mother who pulled her back. It was Teresa who sat beside the bed, waiting for her. And Hensley hates her for it. Hates her for being here. For being real at all.

Her hair is not folded beneath Berto’s hat, nor are his boots on her feet, nor his high-collared shirt buttoned tightly around her neck, but, rather, her long hair is parted gently, falling across her shoulders, a full skirt wrapping her slender hips, a sheer cotton blouse buttoned nowhere near her neck. To Hensley, her beauty seems more of a disguise than Berto’s clothes.

When Teresa sees Hensley’s eyes upon her, she smiles tenderly but says nothing. Hensley turns her own head toward the window, its curtains pulled tight. This single fact tells her that it is true. All the details of her loss rush at her. The boat that carried her through an ocean of murky sadness is suddenly gone and she is on the shore, alone, unprotected, searching the horizon for the people she loves. The words and images that suddenly overwhelm her mind are what she feared most. The truth of the accident.

The bells that started ringing just before dawn, the horses’ hooves that seemed to never stop, the chaos in town as she walked Mr. Reid’s letter to the post, the miners solemnity along the side of the road, their heads bowed, nobody’s eyes meeting hers. The whole thing had seemed like a stage play; an elaborate show designed to test her.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.